HelluvaCook.com! : Super Slow-Cooked Hickory-Smoked Roast Beast!! Again!

Who doesn't need moar beef?! Certainly not someone as carnivorous as I!! The last batch of slow-cooked hickory-smoked roast beast came out so incredible that I was compelled to make 2.5x as much right away! Check out how I did it!

Transmogrifying a massive chunk of beef into a mountain of mouth-watering goodness is not nearly as difficult as one might presume! Nor should it be kept a secret! Hence, yet another post on how it's done!

I started by buying the biggest damn chunk of chuck roast I could find!

At $2.99 for Certified Black Angus Beef from the Restaurant Depot, it can't be beat!

Sure, you don't need to buy 20.66 lbs of meat, but you could!

It cost me ~$85.00 including cost of charcoal & hickory to make this batch!

20.66lbs * $2.99/lb = ~$62.00 plus $15 for charcoal & $8 for hickory! Not bad, eh?!

Bifurcate your meat!

This process doesn't need to be exact. We're just trying to make the meat more manageable while also increasing the amount of surface area to which the rub & seasoning may adhere!

Keep on bifurcating!

Again and again!

Even pieces this large would take faaaar too long in the smoker!

Sure, big restaurants w big, giant smokers/ovens may do this in massive pieces because they have all day and night to cook it, but I'm certainly not a big restaurant! Moreso just a roadhouse!

Now these are looking manageable!

You'll notice that these weren't simply bifurcated again, but rather cut between the muscles.

You'll find that doing so is easier because they are less likely to fall apart when handling them later!

Bring on the next victim!

Once you've had all sortsa fun bifurcating your bigass chunk into reasonable-sized pieces, toss them all into a plastic garbage bag! Double-bag it, yo!

Now, add your rub! I used McCormick Slow Cookers Savory Pot Roast seasoning packets, but you can use whatever floats your boat! Don't reinvent the wheel unless you've got time and $$ to burn!

Tie it up, then squoosh it around until the rub it evenly distributed!

A little lube (veg oil) might not hurt, eh!

Once you've wrestled w your meat long enough to coat all surfaces of the meat somewhat evenly, stick it in the coldbox over night to let the love happen!

Just look at that smoker! Clean as shit and ready to go!

(You'll understand how great this is when you've become acquainted with the all fun involved w/ cleaning these damn grates!)

What are you waitin' for?! Load it up!

Try to leave a little elbow room so that the smoke can get at 'em from all sides!

Looks like this smoker is full to capacity! Ya gotta love it!

Now, close that shit up, stoke the fire, & add a bit of hickory to get the smoke billowing, then fire up that lawn pony and go cut the damn grass! It's time to GSD while the meat is in the smoker!

An hour later and the beef is lookin' happy-happy!

Be sure to keep an eye on it! Add charcoal and water-logged hickory chunks as needed!

And ALWAYS have a big pan of water directly above your heat source to crank up the humidity when you smoke meat! You want the environment to be more akin to a hot, smokey steam room as opposed to a bone-dry, smokey sauna. You'll get much better flavor and juicier meat!

Time to flip 'em!

Flipped!

Lookin' good, huh? Now close it and stoke it!

Continue to let the love happen until it is done!

I flipped and repositioned mine every hour or so to ensure evenness of cooking/smoking!

Gooba Dukes w a quality photobomb in this shot!

This meat looks like it is ready for the next phase!

It's super hot, so be carefs, yo !Stack it on a rack to cool off a bit before attempting to pull it apart.

This wasn't even all of it!

I usually try to make my ppl earn their keep! Getting them to help w this chore was a lot easier than recruiting help to work on the drywall in the bathroom! Go figure!

We did a rough chop/shred on the meat bec it wasn't quite ready to be pulled apart!

At this point, the beef needed to be torn up into smallish chunks so that it can be slow-cooked in the oven at a very low temp for a very long time! Leave in all of the chunks of fat because they will turn in to lotsa lovely au jus in which the meat will languish merrily!

After a few hours of letting the love happen (again!) in the oven, stoach the meat in the fridge over night!

By cooling it over night in the fridge, it will become much easier to remove any bigger chunks of fat that remain!

At this point, the beef is ready to toss into freezer bags for use on a night when you are fresh out of effort & give-a-damn, yet crave something delectable & easy-peasy to cram into your facehole!