Sunday, December 30, 2012

Bröt!! 12-21-2012

Sure, you could go buy bread from the store (hell, I do), or you could get off your lazy ass and make it yourself (which I also do)!    I just made a batch of parmesan/romano cheese garlic dinner rolls and they were awesome!!  Check 'em out!

Mexican Chicken Sliders!! 12-30-2012

I wanted to keep it simple tonight, so I decided to make some pulled chicken!!  This was easy, though not quick, but I had all day to wait and watch football, so why not, eh?!?  Click here to see more!

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Roasted Garlic!! -- 12-18-2012

OMG!  I **love** me some roasted garlic!!! Those of you who know what I'm sayin', know what I'm sayin', and those of you who don't, well... there is hope for you yet!  Click here to see more!

Splitting Logs!! 12-09-2012

Splitting logs in Michigan on a mild December afternoon while huckin' on beer & hangin' out!  Click here to check out the vid!

Videos?! Sure! We've got videos!

Perhaps it was laziness or procrastination, but regardless of the reasons why I have yet to post videos on the HelluvaCook blog, I'm finally getting around to posting a few! Click here to see more!

Dark Meat Chicken Chili!! -- 12-27-2012

Hey!!  I don't know about you, but I'm tired of people eating white meat chicken chili as though dark meat was non-existent! Honestly, white meat chicken doesn't have the right texture, flavor-retention, or the ability to retain its moisture! Seriously, take my word for it! Click here if ya don't believe me!

Pastaccioli!! --12-26-2012

My latest adaptation of mostaccioli has meatballs, two kinds of pasta, sauteed green pepper & onion, and lots of garlic!! Take a look at how I did it!

Friday, December 28, 2012

Schmaltz!! 12-28-2012

Check it out!! I finally got around to freezing the schmaltz from ChickenFest 2012!  Don't know what schmaltz is? Click here to find out!

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Beef Short Ribs!! 12-21-2012

When most people think of ribs, whether baby-back, St. Louis style, or spare ribs, they tend to think of pork! Beef ribs are also incredibly tasty, even though they may not be as popular!  I just made a batch of beef short ribs that came out amazing!  Click here to see how I did it!

Craisin Softbakes!! -- 12-24-2012

OMG!! These Craisin Softbakes are amaze-balls with coffee!! Click here for more!

Monday, December 24, 2012

Today is my b-day!!! --- 12-24-2012

For those of you who might not be aware, Christmas Eve is also my b-day!!  Today just so happens to be my 35th!! I'm not sure what I'm going to do today, but some fun is definitely in order!!  

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Spuds!!! -- 11-21-2012

Spuds!!   These were the redskin potatoes I grew this year!  I couldn't believe how many there were in just one pot!  Click here for more pics!

Smoked Pork Sammiches!!! -- 12/12/2012

It's the end of the world as we know it, and I want... Pork!!!  These little heat-n-eat smoked pork sammiches are awesome!!!  Click here for more!

Sunday, December 16, 2012

A Note To All of My Loyal Readers!! -- 12-17-2012

OMG!!  There just isn't enough time in the day to get shit done and STILL have time to post stuff on this blog!!!  To those of you who are loyal followers of my blog, thank you very much for continuing to come back for more!  For those of you who have checked in, but haven't seen much posted, PLEASE keep coming back!  I promise to dedicate more time to updating this blog in the very near future!  Click here to find out more about what I have been up to!

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Venison Stephenoff! 11-09-2012

Remember the "football roast" from the deer that I carved up the other day?!  Well, I've made it into my very own version of stroganoff! I've hearby dubbed it "Venison Stephenoff" and it is DELICIOUS!!!!  Click here to start salivating!

Monday, November 26, 2012

My First Deer!!!!! -- 11-06-2012

Check it out!! Big Bad Brad brought me the very first deer that I've ever butchered!  Take a peek at how I hacked it up into beautiful steaks and pro-grade swaasage! Click here to see more!  Warning: Not for the squeamish!

Friday, November 23, 2012

Monday, November 12, 2012

ChickenFest 2012: Part Deux!! Post 4 of 3! (bonus!!!) -- 11-03-2012

Was all the work involved with ChickenFest worth it?!  Hell yeah!  Get a load of what one of my freezers looks like at the moment!  Click here to see how it's done!

ChickenFest 2012: Part Deux!! Post 3 of 3! -- 11-03-2012

High quality chicken stock is a rare commodity that isn't necessarily difficult to make, but can take seemingly an eternity!  Click here to see how I made a massive batch at ChickenFest!

Thursday, November 8, 2012

ChickenFest 2012: Part Deux!! Post 2 of 3! -- 11-03-2012

Day Two of ChickenFest 2012: Part Deux was yet another crazy day of hackin' and whackin' birds into manageable-sized pieces!  Get a look at how we did it by clicking here!

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

ChickenFest 2012: Part Deux!! Post 1 of 3! -- 11-02-2012

Holy crap!!  Can you believe how many chickens I got for ChickenFest 2012: Part Deux?!?  I picked up 44 birds for a total of 150 lbs and spent the weekend processing them for storage!  Click here to check out how I did it!

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Affiliation!!! 11-01-2012

Google & Amazon have just promoted the HelluvaCook blog to "affiliate" status!  What this means is that I can link directly to products relevant to the posts and, if my visitors go through with purchasing an item, I get a kickback!  How cool is that?!?
Click here to see a little more about how it works!

Mega Mostaccioli!! -- 10-27-2012

Mostaccioli is an easy, cost-effective way of feeding a crowd! I made a huge batch for the Halloween Blowout Bash!  Click here to check out how I did it!

5000!!!!! 10-31-2012

WoooooHoooooooooo!!!!  Last night, on Halloween of 2012, the HelluvaCook blog got its 5,000th hit!!!!   It only took a year to get to this milestone!  Not a bad start!! I hope to pass the 10k mark in under 6 months from now!  You can help by getting the word out to your friends & family and also by checking back for updates regularly!  

More (& better quality!) t-shirts are on the way, so check back for promotions to win one for yourself!  There will also be more parties and cooking events coming up for those of you who are local!  

Feel free to suggest new content & recipes that you would like to see posted here on!  If you specialize in making a particular dish, I welcome you to contribute your own pictures or video on how you do it!  Post a comment or shoot me a message if you are interested! 

Thanks for checking out my blog!  I didn't think that I would hit the 5k mark in only a year!


Wednesday, October 31, 2012

St. Louis Style Pork Ribs!! -- 10-28-2012

Next time you find yourself contemplating the purchase of ribs that have been marked-down for quick sale, stop screwing around and just buy them already!  You won't regret it! Click here to get your hunger on!!

Chuck Roast & Potatoes!! 10-21-2012

A few weeks ago, my Uncle Jose planted the idea of making a pot roast into my brain & I knew that I wouldn't be able to simply forego making it, so I decided not to fight the urge and just go ahead and whip up a batch! Click here to see how it did it!

Word of the Week: Eloté!!

Today's Word of the Week: Eloté!!
Click here to read all about the easiest way to have corn-on-the-cob on-hand at all times!

Deep Fried Pork Cutlets & Nuggets!!

 OMG, I love pork!  I must eat pork 3 to 5 times a week! Click here to scope out how I make boneless pork cutlets and nuggets!!

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Real Men Eat Salads (too!)!! -- 10-19-2012

Yeah, I know I should eat salad more often, but screw that!  Generally speaking (from a lifetime of personal, first-hand experience), not only are most salad dressings terrible for you (lotsa fat & cholesterol), but so too do they taste horrible!!!  Seriously, Marzetti & Newman can suck it!  Click here to see how to make a salad that needs no dressing to make it edible!!

Monday, October 22, 2012

Clam Bake in C-town!!!! 10-20-2012

OMG!!!  Look at all that seafood!!!!!  Holy crap was it amazing!!  Click here to check out more pics from the 20th Annual Cleveland Clam Bake!!!

Friday, October 12, 2012

Teriyaki Glazed Salmon!! -- 10-05-2012

Salmon!! Not only is it actually GOOD for you, it's also damn tasty and easy to make!!! Click here to see more pics!

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Damn This Shitty Weather!!

Having somehow caught the extended outlook for the local weather on the radio the other day, I was made aware of the possibility of a frost this coming weekend!  Click here to see how I mitigated the risk of frost from killing my garden!

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Hoo Haa's End-of-Summer Bash!! -- 9-29-2012

Once again, as happens each year at this time, the leaves begin to change as the cold weather makes an attempt to sneak up on us in a manner similar to the way in which Oprah sneaks up to a box of doughnuts! Despite the change in weather, Hoo Haa had his annual End-of-Summer Bash at which we gorged ourselves on mountains of smoked pork while washing it down with plenty of suds! Click here to check out more pics of the fun! 

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Stay Tuned!!

Yo!  Sorry I haven't posted the latest pics yet!  I've been swamped at work and at home, but I promise that I'll have them up soon!

Stay tuned!

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Chickenfest 2012 -- Part Deux!!

It's hard to believe that it's been nearly 8 months since the first Chickenfest of 2012, but the time is upon us once again to gather 'round the blazing bonfire to appease the Gods of Poultry by dismembering and ingesting many, many of our delicious feathered-friends!!  Click here to read onward!

Boneless Pork Riblets!! (With an explanation of Vorbereitungen!!)

The meaning of yesterday's post entitled "Vorbereitungen!!" may not have been as crystal clear as I had intended it to be, so let this serve as somewhat of an explanation while at the same time allowing me to show off a few pics of how easily boneless smoked riblets can be prepared for a voyage from whence they shall not return!!

Wednesday, September 26, 2012


Man muss im Leben für die Zukunft vorbereitet sein wenn man das Verlangen verspürt mit geringem Aufwand zu kochen und dabei aber hervorragende Ergebnisse erzielen will ohne sich dabei selbst mit zu viel Mühe zu Grunde zu richten!

BBQ Seasoning Blend!!

Given that everyone has their own preferences and predilections, my prerogative is to adjust store-bought seasoning blends to suit my own taste!  I highly suggest you do the same because these blends are typically formulated to please the lowest common denominator in our society, which means that those of us who prefer more bold, lively flavors have to take drastic and daring measures so that we can continue to live our lives on the edge!! Click here to read on, fellow rabble-rouser! 

Baking Season is Upon Us!!!

Ahh, Michigan, what with it's lovely grey skies and blustery late September evenings.  It's time again to get the bonfire blazing and the oven baking in anticipation of yet another awesome season of Red Wings hockey (hopefully!).  You've just got to love it, right?!?  Right! So, why not throw together a batch of Le Petite Pain au Lait (aka Brotchen, mini milk muffins) to share with a few friends?!  Click here to check 'em out!

Friday, September 21, 2012

Homemade Chicken Nugs for BFC Night!!!

Once again, Thursday rolled around and it was time to gather the usual suspects for some suds and some grub!!  This week, I decided to keep it simple and make some chicken nugs from scratch!  Click here to check out how it’s done!

Pollo con Arroz Y Elote!!

Chicken & Rice with a side veg (read: “vedge”) is a staple dish that can be made any one of a billion ways!  Click here to get your hunger on!

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Ich liebe Brötchen!!

As the change of seasons quickly approaches, I grow ever more excited about being able to bake in the house without heating the joint up to a million degrees!!  Click here for more pics!

Smoked "Fresh" Kielbasa!!

Though there are actually well over 3 dozen types of kielbasa available at your local Polish market, most people are aware of two types: "Smoked" and "Fresh".  Typically, people buy it whichever way they prefer it, but some of us get a ton of each, as we do in my family!  

Strolling through Meijer the other day, I came across a package of "fresh" kielbasa (made in-house!) that was marked down for quick sale, so I figured that I would try my hand (again) at transmogrifying it into "smoked" kielbasa!  Without hesitation, I grabbed the package and threw it in the cart wishing only that they had more available! Unfortunately, I got the last remaining package, so I've been keeping an eye out for more in-house kielbasa ever since then!

Upon my arrival at home, I fired up the smoker unit and whacked up the kielbasa into more easily maneuverable chunks.  Upon commencement of billowing smoke pouring out the sides of the unit, I tossed the sausage in the rig and set it to "auto-pilot" (meaning I put more apple wood in there, closed it, then went to go squeeze another squirt from the fridge-pig).  

With only the occasional addition of apple wood or charcoal, this could possibly have been the easiest smoke session I've had in memorable history.  Only 3 or so hours passed while the kielbasa was feelin' the love in the smoky little box in which it was contained.  

Immediately upon removal of the sausage from it's caliginous tomb, I commenced with hacking it into bite-sized chunks before devouring piece after piece atop Wheat Thins wishing only that I had been able to make more at once because I knew it wasn't going to last long!  Indeed, correct I was in making this assumption because my freshly-smoked fresh kielbasa was such a hit among my co-workers that none of it made it through the next day at work!  This is certainly something I aspire to make again soon!

Bachelor Chow: A Contemporary Cooking Methodology!!

Cooking is like music; both of them are at the same time a form of art and science that takes minutes to get into, but years to master.  Having not (yet) acquired any degree or formal training in culinary science, I'm certainly no master of cooking, but I do have a few tricks up my sleeve to share with those who are interested in saving time and money while not having to sacrifice deliciousness! Bachelor Chow is a term I’ve coined to represent entrees that are comprised of a meat, a veg, and a carb; each of which can be varied to accommodate what you have on-hand to concoct an easy meal that is cost-effective, healthy, and – most importantly – tasty!

Bachelor Chow does not necessarily refer to one particular recipe, but rather a method by which an entrée with countless variations can be created.  Additionally, making Bachelor Chow not only encourages innovation and creativity in the kitchen, but is also an excellent way to practicing one’s timing in the kitchen!  Furthermore, through trial and error, a sense of what flavors and textures are complimentary and work well together will build itself naturally as you attempt different combinations of various ingredients each time you make a new batch.  Before long, your delicious pile of leftovers will be the envy of all your co-workers as they nuke yet another Lean Cuisine or toast up a Hot Pocket!
This Kicked-Up Dirty Rice is a great example of Bachelor Chow (not to mention damn tasty!).   I love this stuff, esp with some Fiery Diablo Seasoning on it!

For this batch of Bachelor Chow, the meat category is represented by a generous pound of burger meat that I had stoached in the freezer for just this occasion.  A bag of mixed veg (pronounced “vedge” – get it right!) is the vegetative matter, while the carb has been represented by the rice, specifically Zatarain's Dirty Rice, in this instance.  Any or all of them could be exchanged for a different ingredient within its respective category to create unique dishes suited specifically to the mood you happen to be in at the moment.  That’s the beauty of Bachelor Chow; you get to dictate exactly what goes into it to determine how it comes out!  Not in the mood for beef? Go with chicken!   No chicken?  Hack up some of the smoked boneless pork loin that you froze last week!  Don’t like mixed veggies?  Swap it out with frozen peas!  Or something from the garden!  No rice on-hand? Pasta or couscous are great alternatives!  The possibilities are endless!

Another beautiful thing about Bachelor Chow, aside from its extreme flexibility, is the ease with which most of the components that make up each batch can be cooked!  Even for people who lack experience and knowledge when it comes to cooking, concocting a batch of Bachelor Chow is somewhat of a no-brainer.  For this reason, I tend to make it when I really don’t want to cook because I’m low on give-a-damn, yet I remain unwilling to compromise eating a quality meal for the sake of convenience!  Furthermore, Bachelor Chow is a dish that can be scaled up for those occasions when you’ve got guests on the way, or hungry little mouths to feed!  Fortunately, I don’t have to worry about feedin’ youngin’s (yet), so I get to enjoy my leftovers at work for the next day or two!

Pooch Wrasslin'!!

My Uncle-Brother Schertzer's dog Bentley is a great sparing partner for hot days when we've both got a bit of scrappin' in us!  This was the second time we've spared & we both had a blast!  He plays rough, but somehow knows not to get toooo rough about it!  By the time we're through, I'm covered in schlobber and we're both laying in the grass panting!!  Check out the pics of this epic battle!

Dome Update!!! Painting Complete!!

Finally!!!  I've managed to knock out the next phase of the Geodesic Dome Project!!!  Though it took an entire weekend to do, painting the struts for the dome was worth every bit of effort & money put into it! Click here to check out more pics!